This moment contains all moments.

i hate you and never want to see you again. i'm done wasting my time on someone who doesn't appreciate me and doesn't even respect or try to understand things that are important to me. you are one of the most selfish people i have ever known...so you got a pretty good deal being with someone so selfless huh? yet you don't even see that. you turn a blind eye to everything good and nice to do for you...i make you dinner, i buy you random little thoughtful gifts, i try to comfort you when you are stressed. and what do i get in return? a big fucking smack in the face. crawl back in your little hole and drown in your shallow self centeredness. im nolonger taking the blame and feeling guilty for shit that i shoudlnt apologise for. you don't even deserve a goodbye. and i hope you rot in hell. i dont need you and am just fine without you. and if im such a burden as you say you won't care either. which i know you don't...as you also clearly state so many times. words can't even express the hatred, disgustedness and anger that consumes me right now. though i have tried. - amor e morte.

i'm better off alone.

when you finally trust me, finally believe in me...i will let you down. so that you know how it feels. why do i keep giving in and trying to make it work with someone that clearly doesn't appreciate me or value me...and doesn't understand me. and doesn't want to understand me? why do i make a fool out of myself time and time again with someone that only wants to be with me when it suits them? and why do i accept the blame so many times when it's not my fault, just because he refuses to see or admit to his flaws and issues? why do i keep on believing that he cares aboujtk any of this and wants to work at it for me? because deep down i know he won't. why do i accept less than what i know i deserve....and why do i keep on running back and apologising for things that i know i shouldn't apologise for...? maybe i'm just scared of being alone. even though i know i am probably better off that way. - amor r morte.