Is this life?

Sometimes I sit and wonder what it would be like to be someone else..to wake up in someone elses skin...and mind. Sometimes I get so sick of living with these thoughts...of being myself, of pretending to be someone I'm not...that it just seems too hard. So I continue wearing this mask, but who am I really? Will I ever be the person that I want to be? How can I be that person when I don't even know where I belong? I often sit and watch people. I mean, really watch them...analyse them even. I wonder what it's like to be them. I envy them. I wonder how people can smile and laugh genuinely. It seems to come so easy for them...And I don't know what that feels like. I wonder what it would be like to be someone who takes happiness for granted. I wonder what it would be like to be happy... And I wonder if the only reason some of us were put on this earth is to suffer? I wonder why this is called life, when this isn't really living... I am dead inside. But everyone else thinks I'm alive. -Amor e morte