When will this end...?

I should be happy. But how do I make this so when all I feel is dead inside? I can't feel. I try to feel what I know I should be feeling...but it's not the same. I try so hard to stay afloat...and nobody knows. Nobody knows how much strength it takes to get by each day. I don't look to the future anymore...I just look to tomorrow; live day-by-day. It's easier that way. That is the only way I have learnt to survive. I don't know if I will ever come to life again...and that scares the hell out of me. -Amor e morte